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John_Hsieh
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Name: John
Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 3/12/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: anything that moves.. hahah jk jk, many things interest me, as long as it doesn't involve calculus
Expertise: being idle....making random conversations
Occupation: Unemployed/Between Jobs
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  liljohnjohn xp
Member Since:
3/20/2004
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| This is the natural progression of med school....
1st year, they scare you to death
2nd year, they make you study to death
3rd year, they work you to death
4th year, they bore you to death
I think that I am really looking forward to be bored to death next year.
p.s. I think I shouldn't use the word death so much in such a short post.
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| I am a firm believer that when you fail to meet your expectation, it's not because you can't, but it's because that's not what God wants. This is the beginning of my 3rd year in med school, as much as I have learned about medicine, I think I have learned even more about my own life.
I remembered when I was applying to college in HS, I applied to just 4 or 5 UCs around southern California. My SAT score wasn't bad, but it's definitely not Ivy league worthy. I ended up going to UCR.
I applied to med school my senior year in college. My grade wasn't bad, but it's not the best, and despite what I thought was a really good effort, my MCAT score wasn't top notch. I ended up applying to around 30 something med schools, hoping that I would just be lucky and land somewhere. I ended up attending MCW.
After SAT, MCAT, and at the age of 25, I took yet another test that would determine where I would possibly end up in the future. I took my Step 1 in June this summer. I am completely thankful and satisfied that I passed my board, but again, despite what I thought was my best effort, I did not do as well as I wanted.
After all these years, I guess I have never really met my own expectations. But experience has taught me that things would always worked themselves out, as long as I've put in honest and sincere effort. I believed that the reason why I attended UCR and MCW is not because I couldn't do any better. But it's because that's the two best schools for me. As I look at my Step 1 score, I am reminded of the things that I have learned in the past. It is true that there is absolutely no way that I would become a plastic surgeon at Harvard with my board score. But I know that no matter where I end up two years from now, it's not because I couldn't do any better. It is what God thinks is the best for me.
ps. I will share about my rotation experiences later.
-john
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| It seems like life can be reduced down to many moments, the first day of middle school, taking the first SAT, or even the first time playing with the worship team. When we think back in our lives, we don't see it as a continum but more as a slide show composed by different moments. Tomorrow, I will be stepping into another moment of my life.
Sometimes it's funny to think about how a test can evaluate a person. From SAT to MCAT to Step 1, it's funny to think about everything that I have learned in the past two years would somehow reduced down to an 8 hour test. But i guess that is just how the system works.
Am I ready? I don't think I will ever be ready. Am I nervous? yea. Deep down inside, do I wish that I don't have to take it at all? of course.
The truth is that life does not wait. It forces us to step into different "moments" whether we think we are ready or not. I don't think anyone is ever fully ready to go to college, be in a relationship, or even start a family for the very first time.
So I guess there is really no need to ask myself whether I am ready or not. The moment is here and I am going to step into it. I can't promise a good result but I can promise a good effort. I can't assure anyone that I will pass but I can assure everyone that I surely tried. I don't feel right to boldly ask God to just let me pass, but I feel comfortable asking him to let the result justly reflect what I know.
And there it is, no matter how big this task seems to me right now, it is merely a moment of my life.
PS. In order to enhance your reading experience of this post, please listen to "A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson while reading it. | | |
| After another low practice test result:
Me: "I am gonna fail, I think I might need to take my board again after this one!!!!"
Mom: " It's okay to take your board twice, There are many second chances in life, as long as you don't marry twice."
Me: "Nay, if my first wife dies, then I get to marry again."
Mom: "..................................."
Sometimes I just say things that cross the line, now I know why people don't take me seriously.
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| My study philosophy has always been if you find yourself sitting around and not able to concentrate, you might as well just go home, watch some TV and sleep. However, I have not been able to concentrate for like the past two days, and I definitely cannot afford to watch TV and sleep all day with finals coming up!! Anyway, I have not post on xanga for awhile now, but I still do browse through people's blog from time to time. I actually do enjoy reading about people's blog, even if it's just about everyday stuff. There are always fun or deep stuff in ppl's blog, it's a pretty awesome way to kill time (assuming you have a lot of time to kill... a time to kill?? is that a movie title name??). Anyway, for all you bloggers out there, I want to encourages you guys to keep on blogging regularly. Even though you might not have receive as many e-props as you would like, I want to assure you that people (at least I am) do read your blog regularly!! Alrighty, that's it from me. This is a super lame post, so please don't feel compelled to leave a comment even if you really want to. Please restrain yourself, please.......
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